The Shack

I am reading a book that has really captured my life at this moment. It has significantly moved my thinking to another time and space. It has reminded me of who God really is and how He revealed Himself to me when I needed Him most. This view of God had become cloudy but now it is clearer and this book helped me see again.

When I was sitting in the hospital with Elijah I saw, felt and experience God deeper than I ever have in my life. He was so real. I knew He was with me. I couldn't have made it through without Him. He showed Himself as a God of love, patience and understanding. I knew that He was in control and that whatever happened He would be there with me and that made everything OK.

The book The shack has brought this picture of God back to my understanding. Reminding me of His constant love and care. If I could buy it for everyone I know I would. I know some with not accept it. Some because they cannot move from their own view of God and others because they don't want to know Him. It doesn't matter. Even if you read this book just for the story it will touch your life. It is a novel, an allegory, but it is so much more.

Hannah's Home!

Beth's b-day


4th of July

It has been so awesome to have Hannah home from Puerto Rico! It has been so much fun to just hang out with friends and spend time with family. We really have missed her!

Two years ago you came into our lives

Two years ago today we had the most beautiful baby boy God could have given us. His name was Elijah Lucas Appel. We named him Elijah because God took the prophet Elijah up to heaven in a chariot. He did not die. We knew Elijah our son might die so we wanted to give him a strong name. A name that represented life everlasting.
Elijah was a little prophet himself. His smile was infectious. He could draw you into his world with his clear blue/gray eyes. They painted a picture of love, trust and something else that was not of this world. Something that words cannot express.

I do wish Elijah was still with us. Yet, I know that he is where he should be. I rest in that. I do not regret nor do I ponder on the what ifs. It was an experience I will never forget. It was hard and heartbreaking at times but I felt the presence of God like no other time in my life. Every moment was precious and meaningful. Elijah's life was not a tragedy or a waste. His every breath was a message and his life was a testimony. If we catch that message and see that testimony then his life is more meaningful that some that healthy and live until they are old.

Dear sweet Elijah,
I will never forget you! Being your mommy was a gift I will treasure the rest of my life. I can't wait to see you again.
Love,
Your mommy